Friday, January 18, 2008

Polishing

I have been thinking a lot about my situation. Why I am in it, what it means and what I am going to do about it. Seems that nothing bad ever happens by itself. Lost my job, ran through my savings, lost my unemployment, bedbugs, Department of Labor wants me to pay the unemployment back. Now what am I to do. A new MySpace friend sent me the quote below a couple of days ago and it seemed to make things a bit clearer.

Life is a grindstone, but whether it grinds you down or polishes you up depends on what you are made of.
- Robert E. Johnson, an African-American Entrepreneur

[From Wisdom for the Soul - Attitude ]

I am thinking about my next steps. I know I am going to have to apply for Public Assistance. LOL, still makes me sick. I need medical assistance and I have no income, so I will have to apply and go through the initial process in order to get the medical insurance.

Right now I crippled. I can't search the web, I don't have a reliable connection. I have been connecting through Bluetooth Pan on my phone, but the only thing I seem to be able to connect to is Adium. I miss my IM buddies, the one's I talk to regularly anyway. I can't even access my email. I did make it to the library yesterday. My MacBook kept dropping the WiFi connection, so in the 3 or so hours I was there, I got little done. Every time I thought I was sending something, I wasn't, LOL.

I realize, I need to adjust. I just hit my low point. I refuse to fall any lower. I am being polished. I have simply grown and come too far to be ground down. I realize that I have a lot of support now, at least emotional. A lot of people believe in me, some don't even know me, but they say they see something special in me. I will not let you guys down, I will not let my son down and I will not let myself down. I have come so far and have so much farther to go.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

I so love hearing that! I am a spiritual person and I think that we have to go through the fiery trials in our life for just that Polishing! G-D has something instore for you, I can feel it. Prayer is the key to everything.. My favorite qoute to live by is "When You Are Down To Nothing, G-D IS UP To Something"! Just keep waiting and praying, G-D is getting ready to do somethings in you and your son's life!

You are a great Father, I can just tell and you are a wonderful Person!

Keep Your Head Up!
Nebaby!!!

Anonymous said...

I have no idea how I found your blog but i quickly read the first few lines of this post and tought maybe you should look into a few things that have helped me:

1. The law of attraction (the subject)
2. The Secrect (DVD) Some clips free on youtube.
3. Think and grow rich (The book)

let me know if u need anything else.

chris at hotimpression.com

Anonymous said...

"Adversity has the effect of eliciting talents, which in prosperous circumstances would have lain dormant." -Horace

I believe this is so true. I have been through a lot myself in the past couple years. I'm now unemployed for the second time in a year and still searching for work. Trying to figure out how I'm going to save money for school. The hell I've been thru dealing with relationships. But one thing I know is in it all I found a little more strength to go out there and be the woman that I truly want to be. I've never thought of myself as necessarily a strong person but when I look back I am so thankful for the experience. There is not one bad experience in this life I regret b/c I can honestly say that there was always something good that came from it.

I really pray that you stay encouraged and in high spirits. You'll be a great inspiration to someone just as much as you are now. Those who have it easy are never admired or remembered, envied, but not looked up too. So milk this lesson for all its worth and when you come out on top you'll have a inspiring story to tell.

BTW, one more quote that is on my page:

I am still determined to be cheerful and happy, in whatever situation I may be; for I have also learned from experience that the greater part of our happiness or misery depends upon our dispositions, and not upon our circumstances.

Martha Washington