From Jen (02/2005)

This was sent to me by a long time friend, Jen. She can write, I think she should be published.

Good night, sweet prince. I shall weep at your departure. I have searched for you all of my life. I have checked under subway benches and bus stops. I have played peekaboo against abandoned building waiting to catch a glimpse of your shadow. I’ve jumped inside barren trenches and gone underground on the slight chance that you were sharing living quarters wih the ground hog.

I have climbed rooftops and scaled high-rises in search of you. I have simmered in seedy clubs and bathed in bad associations because I truly believed you were there - I just thought you were scared and hiding.

I have jeopardized myself chasing trains that I thought you had boarded. I’ve grabbed the tail end of planes, fearing you may have landed and taken off before you found me. I have traveled the globe in hopes I would recognize your face and then I have gone back again fearful that I missed you the first time around.

I have peered through eyeglasses,looking glasses and magnifying glasses searching for your foot prints.I have even enlisted the help of physics to convince me you exist.

I have gazed into the eyes of other womens husbands and boyfriends wondering “Could it be you?” And I wondered if you had missed me all together be accident. I have traced steps on cemetery grounds on morbid days believing you have already come and gone, and would never come again and thought perhaps THAT was the real reason for your no-show status

I’ve stolen peeks through picture windows at dinner time staring at the back of his head, and his head, begging you to JUST TURN AROUND.

I have pulled double duty at bridal showers and weddings. Standing up for her and in for the other. I have watched ever one I know celebrate the arrival of her prince, every one but me.

Good night, sweet prince I shall weep at youe departure. If you came, I didnt see you. If you spoke, I didnt hear you. And if you loved me once upon a time,I guess I didnt love you back the same.

Good night sweet prince.
Good night.
It’s time for me to move on with my life and experience an new day.
A real day.
My first day with out craving you (sic)